Pages of Mariskova

How do you end a year? I mean really end it and feel like you have put it behind you?

Do you go out and party?

Do you stay home and pray?

Or you just don’t care because it always feels the same? The sun still shines tomorrow. Or the past still haunts you tomorrow.

I cannot, or haven’t been able to really say goodbye last year and welcome new year. What is it to good-bye and to welcome? Life will be like it is. On some months it will be improving, on some days it will be devastating. What’s new?

Resolutions? Being better? Sure. But do you need a new year to really say ‘I’ll be a better person next year, but since next year is still a week away I’ll take my time being whatever!’

Resolutions are thought because you just experience something terrible. It’s like an enlightenment. You did or experienced something bad, you had enough, and then you promised yourself you’d be a better person. New year is just not it. Not with all the trumpets and fireworks, of course.

So, friends, bitter as my post might feel, let me console you. If you cannot find one, two, a hundred New Year’s resolutions, don’t feel bad. It only shows you are human, you are normal, you are not fake, you are you. But, if you cannot find even one thing, ONE THING(!), to improve in your life every time you get up from your bed every morning… then you need to consider how to revolutionize your life!

Happy New You!

Si Mami dan saya bukan lah pasangan standar ibu-anak perempuan yang biasa ditemukan di dunia. We are not best friends, although we are not enemies either. Saya dan si Mami bukan jenis pasangan ibu-anak perempuan yang biasa saling curhat. Saya bukan jenis anak perempuan yang ngintilin si Mami, atau nangis bombay ke Mami karena patah hati, atau manis manja ke si Mami saat sedang minta perhatian, atau merengek ke si Mami saat sakit, atau belanja baju berdua lalu saling memilihkan baju masing-masing, bahkan bukan juga jenis anak perempuan yang apabila diwawancara reporter akan bilang, “Oh, Ibu saya adalah pahlawan saya. Dia idola saya. Saya gak bisa tidur tanpa Ibu saya.”

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Sudah tiga jam saya muter-muter mencari ide. Buku-buku bertebaran di atas kasur, beberapa keping audio cd sudah bolak-balik pasang, kamus sudah penuh berisi tempelan kertas warna-warni, pensil dan penghapus juga sudah semakin tipis, tapi ide di kepala masih belum muncul juga. Padahal saya sudah menyisakan sedikit ruang di kepala saya dengan cara menghapus file-file berisi -misalnya- cara memperbaiki rantai kalung yang putus, cara menegur staf dengan lebih halus, cara marah kepada bos dengan lebih sopan, cara menyimpan gosip panas sehingga bisa saya gunakan di masa depan, dsb. Ruang kosong di kepala saya itu memang saya maksudkan untuk hal-hal yang lebih penting.

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We -my friends and I- were sitting there, at the back of the room, behind hundred of conference participants, listening to an ELT figure talking about being a teacher while being happy. We -my friends and I- are teachers with additional work, and so we were supposed to be happy too.

The presentation was the last session of the day, and the day was the last day of the event. That means we -my friends and I- were at the end of a couple of months, and weeks, and hours of mental deprivation. Please reread and underline if necessary the words: a couple of months, and weeks, and hours.

Then, it was only normal that when we finally finished the day, we decided to go out in the middle of the night to take a walk. We thought taking a walk could release us from stress and as a result we were cured from our mental deprivation. Of course, we thought wrong. And by the end of the walk, we realized that we had been unhappy too long to be cured by a one-hour motivational speech.

So, instead of feeling sorry for our unhappy state, we came up with the Science of Unhappiness. We might not be happy people but at least we have a brain like a rocket scientist’s.

The Science of Unhappiness

by the six of us

1. Unhappy people are pessimistic. And it is good to be pessimistic because it means we don’t exaggerate things. It keeps people in perspectives.
2. Unhappy people are sharp. They never overlook small mistakes.
3. Unhappy people are motivated people because they are driven by anger, hatred, revenge, and bad experiences.
4. Unhappy people always find ways for improvement because they are not easily forgiving.
5. Unhappy people are sensitive to comments, opinions, inputs, suggestions, etc. Being sensitive makes unhappy people perfectionists. And the best people at work are the perfectionists.
6. ……………. (fill in the blank with your sentences)